Wise Sage Wannabe Mugs

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

That party went well.

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

'Chicken soup for dummies who don't sweat the small stuff.'

Voltaire

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

Bishop with a crozier case.

"Time heals all wounds. It also kills every living thing."

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

'How am I supposed to meditate with your nose whistling?'

'They say ninety is the new eighty.'

Couldn't you have used a smaller font?

Getting to Know You

Barry Cryer.

'Plant a tree, build a house, father a child and make sure that there is a good lawyer in your closest circle of friends.'

"You're confusing guilt with feelings of remorse. With remorse, you don't need a lawyer."

"Don't worry, it's nothing."

How to believe in yourself.

'Meaning of life, eh? -- Who wants to know?'

Strange and exotic creatures that exist on other planets - and ones that exist here on earth.

Bucket List Coffee Shop - "Where Seniors Get Big Ideas!"

"Either the crystal ball's had it or you have."

'All that we learn from history is that we don't learn from history...'

'These people have terrible attention spans - I'll just bring them ten commandments at a time.'

Having a senior moment

Starfleet Command. Live long and prosper. Vulcans must have great retirement benefits.

"It's customary to climb all the way up."