Wildlife Conversationalist T-Shirts

"Species loss has hit him hard."

'Did you see his face when I asked for his hunting license?'

"Shut up, shut up, shut up! I don't want to hear about your tough childhood, bitter divorce, estranged children and health issues! Go! Just go! I'm depressed now!"

"My dad shot an oryx once."

"Brad was shot by one of those pink rifles, so at least it was for a good cause."

Alligator Reserve. Talk to them if you like, but don't tell them to "walk a mile in our shoes."

'Do they put up signs that say, 'Do not feed the moose.'?...'

"If you follow my ten-step program, you'll be able to channel your anger better and become a more efficient predator..."

"Killer? Is that what they call us? Eh don't say killer tiger or killer charm or killer wolf."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"Happy Gnu Year!"

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Eat me"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"Too much concealer?"

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

"I've never had a bird's eye view of anything."

"Now I think of Mom whenever it's cold."

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Ever eat a bird?"

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

'Pray for me.'

Giraffe Portrait

'Nice jingle!'

Biodiversity

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"