Whimsical Workplace Warrior Pillows

"Nobody's around. Let's chug it."

'Fairy Friday'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

37 years in the same position.

"How's your insomnia?" "Bad, I can't even fall sleep during meetings."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

Low-Energy Drinks

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tick, tock-tock, tickety-tick tock ….

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

Working Late

'The boss put his picture up to enspire us. But it just isn't having that effect on me.'

Laptop Dancing.

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

"I am not a workaholic. I just work to relax."

Five doors: Push, Pull, Up High, Down Low, Too Slow.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'