Whimsical Diner Regular Prints

"The usual."

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

Periodic table for two. Chez LMN't

'How is the water prepared?'

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

'Yeah we found it, hey Ichabod, remember that jack o' lantern somebody left at table two this morning? Where is it?'

'I'm afraid the Chef's Surprise today is that he ran off with one of the waitresses.'

'I'm sorry the cod was not as good as when you came a month ago. It should have been - it was the same fish...'

'Ralph, I'm gonna' need wings on the fly!'

Diner. Breakfast Specials. I'm a type "C" personality. Until I have my morning coffee I have no personality at all.

Okay... which one of you ordered the holy mackerel?

"It's the Chef Surprise."

Big Birthday Boy Breakfast.

"Apologies for the delay. Your eggs Benedict should be up soon."

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

'I'm not very hungry after eating my first quarter losses.'

Pie.,

'It probably wasn't a good idea to ask for seperate cheques.'

"Our special today? Hot wings!!"

DINER, 'No more rumcake for you, pal - go on home to your wife and elves.'

"It's nothing new. We've always offered a complimentary beard wash following an order of ribs."

"Freshly ground Ozempic?"

Diners sit in high chairs, wear bibs and eat baby food. Man says: 'I love this place, it's just so retro.'

I recommend the ketchup.

'You don't need a menu here, mate. If you can't see it on my apron, we don't sell it.'

"For dessert I'll have milk and cookies."

'Waiter there's a mouse in my soup.'

'The chef says that the quail was out but he prepared that little critter he ran over on the motorway which tastes similar and you nouveau riche snobs will never notice the difference anyway.'

"I hear the sparrow-goldfish chowder is to die for...at least once."

"You were supposed to be IN the soup!"

Al's Breakfast Diner. No conversation, please -- The left side of my brain doesn't kick in till my second cup.