Whimsical Christmas Mythologist Mugs

Santa's elevator

'That's right Bill, I caught the Gingerbread Man...'

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

He Sees You When You're Sleeping

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

'Son, you're old enough now to know, there's no such thing as Christmas.'

A group of ladies fearful to leave their cab as the cabman has mistletoe on his hat

'I'm not saying that global warming is a reality...'

'Sorry Son, I might be the fastest animal on land, but I don't think I could catch the Gingerbread Man...'

Santa's Nightmares

Happy St Pancakes Day!

"Y' know Sir - Red really is your colour..."

'Moon Jumper One, you are entering restricted Christmas airspace. ABORT!;

'Number two - can you say: 'Screw the milk and cookies...where's the VCR?' In a cheerful, jolly voice?'

"I told the carol singers where to go in no uncertain terms, so that's saved us some money!"

Three Wise Women: 'Then at about six weeks or so you can probably expect a touch of colic...'

"Peace on earth. Goodwill to all men and who ordered the triple cheese with extra pepperoni?"

'That's right Bill, I caught the Gingerbread Man...'

'These are Trans-Fat free, right?'

"If Santa knows when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake...is he with the CIA?"

"I'm sorry, Rudolph, but empathetic soulsource crystal navigation has made that nose of yours pretty much obsolete."

'About this patriarchal middle-class morality of yours....'

Virgin Mary reads card: 'SORRY! The Angel Gabriel called to bring you glad tidings of great joy, but you were out.'

"It was never about the presents - it's about the power."

"Life was a LOT easier before AI and the 'Internet of things'!"

'I'll be down in a mo. I'm filling in for the partridge who is on a toilet break.'

Chimney-Greasing Santa

"I believe you're Santa, but Spike isn't so easily convinced."