Western Wisdom Seeker Gifts

'You fellas know what the code of the west is? I need it to get online.'

"If you kick her with the left spur, she'll give you more lumbar support."

"Feel free to take notes."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

'Oh, crap.'

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

"Life's a lottery - That's why you need balls"

How Rings In Nature Indicate Aging.

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Beyond the known and the unknown.

'You must heal yourself.'

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'

FAQs.

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."