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Gustave Flaubert

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Dawing your Cellphone

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

'I always thought a dogfight was a lot of snarling and walking around stiff-legged.'

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

Hombre's Best Friend.

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

Sea Horse outside saloon

J. D. Salinger

'Roy Rogers is ambused'

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

'The autopsy revealed he was indeed a yellow-bellied, lily-livered varmint!'

Wild West Text Showdown

CW 'Text' Yomp Sidekicks: Attorneys-at-law,

"Things get more interesting at noon."

Lee Van Cleef

'Just a trim for me thanks.'

'You dirty, snivelling, low down, arrogant son of a gin-swilling kleptomaniac.'

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."