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'Give me a bowl of the hard stuff! And where can I get a hot bath and a grooming around here?'

"Actually, Luke, the Native American Indian does have a legitimate grievance."

The Gun that made the West feel good about itself

Hare versus the Tortoise

Cowboy.

Oil Fight.

'Git off yore high horse, stranger...'

'Who's the best vet in town?'

The end of the American old west.

'Cal, back home rustling is a hanging offense, what do we do with him out here?'

'Sorry, Kemosabe, but me gottum better offer from Sergio Leone,'

'Anyone here answer to the name 'The Eldorado Kid'?'

How the West was won.

"The posse is catching up. we better split up."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Billy. The Kid.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

Nun Fight.

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"Shootout at the Soapy Canal"

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

Historic Bank Jobs.

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

The Comfiest Hombre in the West

"You funnin' me, bub?"

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

'OK, let's see who's going to be the pack horse today: Heads or tails?'

Crossing the Nachos Grande