Wellness Trend Aficionado T-Shirts

A panda waiting for bamboo juice

Raw food, after you leave for work.

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

"Slow down. I need another drink. Can we rest for a minute?"

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

"My approach is nontraditional, but from a uniquely Western perspective."

'Do you Joan, promise to love, cherish and make sure John takes his cholesterol lowering medication every day?'

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

Too Skinny, Too Fat

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

'Sorry Sir, you've had enough,'

"Holy moly!"

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"

"Well of course it's fast food. I cooked it faster than a speeding bullet."

'You've made wonderful progress,Miss Pritchard.'

"We couldn't find a raw-vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, non-G.M.O. cake for your birthday, so we got you nothing."

'It's a new reality show about a reality show producer...'

'What kind of quack is he? No pills, no special diets! He just believes in will power!'

"Good for you for getting your mammogram."

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

"Look at it this way, dear, if our bodies are 80% water, then you’re not fat, you’re flooded."

'Rent two 'feel good' movies, and call me in the morning.'

"We've gone glutton-free."

"First, I'd like to know what arrangements your company has for flexitime!"

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

"It's all down to turmeric!"