Wellbeing Warrior Gifts

Highest Anxiety

"My wife and I are deeply in love, my children are a delight, my career is exciting, I find solace and inspiration in my religion, I'm as healthy as anybody I know. But, still, something is missing."

"These days it's more about feeling good than getting kids to eat their spinach."

"More . . . Prozac. . ."

"So, what makes you think I'm a therapist?"

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'Well, well, well...'

Be Healthy

"Your contents have shifted."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

Hot Pie Therapy

"You left your demons here last week."

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'If you don't chill out, you are definitely heading for a meltdown...!'

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"I have a huge house, millions in the bank, and a twenty year old wife. But am I happy?..."

Couples Massage: "Did you remember the body oil?"

"Uptight End"

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

"I told him he should have trained more."

Shrinks in heaven

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'