Weight-watchers In Denial T-Shirts

Overweight Woman Cheating On Scales.

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

Secretive Weigh In.

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

Dieting Motivation.

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

"Look, I can still fit into the suit I wore during the last paradigm shift."

'Don't step on that in your bare feet - my mom does and screams.'

'No, that doesn't make any difference either, Miss Jones.'

'Will we ever get a morning-after pill for over-eating?'

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

"Nice try Mrs Wimslow"

"Oh come on!... How can I only have lost two ounces?!"

'I envy your metabolism.'

'Well my lightest ever was 7lbs 4oz. . .'

New Years Reolutions

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

'She was always very proud of her figure.'

'Don't rush me. I'm adding up the calories!'

'How is the new diet going?'

Dessert Storm Veteran

'Wait! Let me clip my nails first.'

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

"I remember the days of skim, 1% and even 2%. Now, it's right to the whole milk section."

'To make matter worse, our combined weight is higher than our credit score.'

How much did you lose on your 14 day diet?

'Doris, I know how much you weigh. Step on the scale and I'll hand you the fish.'

'Nothing grows in the shade.'

Instagram!!!

'You are 14st 3lb..But then, you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.'

The hand's gone around twice.

Your weight and fortune. What you'll weigh now...what you'll weigh 10 years from now.

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."