Weight Loss Counselor Pillows

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

"I used to be a medium, but now I'm a large."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

Bear who goes drinking instead of hibernating

"Whoa. Have you lost weight, professor?"

Jump-Rope Rhymes For Adults

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

'I'm afraid I can't accept that excuse Mrs Hart. It isn't possible to inhale second hand calories.'

'The good news is that our latest diet products work fabulously well. The bad news is that we haven't got any customers any more!'

"Well we COULD tell people to eat less and exercise more, but where's the money in that?"

Opioid Epidemic

'I don't know what happened in there, Stanley... But I've completely lost the urge to eat. I mean it - I feel stuffed! Supposed to come back right before thanksgiving for a follow-up though.'

The Catkins Diet

"So if I need to stop smoking and lose weight..what are you going to do about it?"

'Lose those unsightly man boobs - JOIN THE US MARINES!'

Don't you think you've had too many drinks?

"The diet seems to be working."

I've been on this green leafy diet for months...

"We need to break your addiction to prescription drugs. Let's see if this prescription helps."

Health spa...

Next! (liposuction specialist)

"Say, Flo, did you make an appointment with a lifestyle counselor?"

'It's the thin person inside you, screaming to get out - I'm afraid he's not alone.'

'I've discovered a new diet. I can eat as much as I like but I'm not to swallow.'

"I'm glad you're trying to quit smoking Dr. Jekyll, but the withdrawal symptoms turn you into a completely different person!"

'If you're not sure of the name of a client then check it on the system, don't just shout 'Hey Fatso'.'

'You can only take this so far Ms.Jones.'

'I've got three jobs and it works great! As a diet consultant, I help people who got fat from too much pizza and as a mechanic, I repair the cars I wrecked on my pizza delivery tours.'

'Of course I'm on a strict diet, doc! I eat vegetarian animals only!'

Man covered in patches - "That's the worst smoking habit I've ever seen."