Wedding Planners Who Love Twists T-Shirts

Jane and Tarzan's wedding.

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

Wedding disaster #27.

The Happiest Hen in Acle

'We're a non-profit organisation. We didn't plan it that way, but that's how it worked out.'

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

'With this ring I thee dropped it -'

'I still say it was a mistake having the ceremony TOO close to his stag night!'

Prenuptial Wedding Cake

Saleswoman holds mirror up to the backside of the bride's dress

Australian wedding, sheep gesturing, 'If there's anybody here who knows why these two should not be wed...'

'Smile and say: tofu-based dairy substitute.'

'What do you mean - you want a white wedding?'

'I will subject to certain conditions...'

'In just six hours you will be simultaneously cured of your fear of snakes, heights, small spaces and commitment.'

A bride and her father walk down an aisle decorated with cost of the wedding.

'How about June? -- I've always had June weddings!'

'You look lovely darling, but it's a bit over the top for a first date. . .'

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'

Wedding cake figures having marital problems.

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am a 24-year-old man. The woman I am about to marry is having second thoughts because she believes that we are too young. What do you think? - Jacob. Actual reader letter. Great question. When is the right time to marry? Randy, our commitment expert, would you like to handle this one? Jacob, really, what were you expecting?! Medic! Randy's not moving.

"Please put the ring on her finger, Mr Stroodel - I'm sure she'll give you a receipt after the service."

Internet wedding - 'Apparently, you get a 40% discount if you marry on-line...'

Terri and Glenn devise a way to make those tough final choice on their wedding guest list.

"Look—let's just get past today, O.K.?"

"Brilliant idea of yours,darling-only inviting no-sweet tooths!"

Murder on the Newlywed Game.

'Wait a minute -- aren't you going to read me my rights?'

"Whew! At last, I can eat!"

'Wait a minute! Aren't you the chap who refused planning permission on the St., Mary's church extension?'

'I hope you don't mind carpooling.'

'Mark my words - this will all end in tears!'

"He just rang to say carry on without him and he'll see us at the reception."