Web Workshop Wizards T-Shirts

"I'm going to Internet Anonymous meetings.They have a great website!"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"We only got six days of funding."

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

"Lovely dovetail."

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"It's my intelligence, talent and hard work that have got me to the top."

Waiting for retirement.

Targets.

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

George Martin

Gerald Ratner's return

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

"Just play the hit single, then you can do the experimental track."

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

'He will observe your text now...'

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

The Move.

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

'Yes, I'm very punctual. I always use commas and periods.'

"Before we decide that SEO is dead, can someone tell me what SEO is?"

Start the session by doing something unusual.