Web Page Magician T-Shirts

"Do NOT refresh this page."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'How fast can you hype?'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

Instructional guide to scribbling

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

If Disney was a software company

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

Gerald Ratner's return

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

'We are in a race against time and the auditors. Gentlemen...start your shredders!'

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Before we decide that SEO is dead, can someone tell me what SEO is?"

Websiteless -- please help.

Go on! Pick a card.

Somebody should really be filming this for YouTube.

'I guess this is what we get for going to a discount web-page designer.'

The imagery attacks the compalcency of the casual web surfer and uses a visual cacophony of discordant images to excite and enthusethe casual visitor...

'Let's put it this way, your Billy is the only kid in class without his own website,,,'

"This one comes with a special undo function for erasing any stupid thing you've done or said in your entire life. It doesn't really work, of course, but it's SUPER fun to play with!"

'My nephew Richie can download all your work from the internet for free. You are all fired.'

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

Free and Open Source Software.

'I'm just surfing the web.'

"I wish whoever hacked my site would let me know what my password is."

The internet providing marketing, research, and data collection.

'Wow, Ed! You look so much younger! Cosmetic surgery?' 'No. Digital enhancement!'

I have a homepage, therefore I am.

'No, I'm not a connoisseur, but I do have a website.'

I told you not to text and spin, Simone.

"Looks like business is picking up."

'I need something that would shuffle papers while I'm out of the office.'

"How come some media companies are so shy of web recruitment?" "Anorak-naphobia?"