Watching Live Performances T-Shirts

Elton John Glastonbury

Zombie standup

Pete Townshend Vineyards

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

Comedy Cafe

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

'She sounds like your mother when you told her that you were going to marry me.'

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

Theatre Crowd

Applause

"Free Bird!"

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

"Tong!"

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

See, Catty-O? I told you dinner was included with admission.

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

Plum jam...

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Cello Concert

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

Suddenly, Becky noticed something which gave her pause.

"This next song I wrote I won't sing due to political correctness."

Strong Female Lead