Vulture Humorist Pillows

"Hi, I'm Bob Darrel. I'm here to perform the audit of your books. Don't mind the vultures. They follow me everywhere."

'I'm just outside feeding the birds.'

Tut and Carmen.

Venus

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

Distractions Of The Great

Tourists in Egypt

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

The only way to see the world is to see the world

The Rise of Modern Art

No time for sirtaki now, Greece!

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

"There's more inside."

'Time to buy.'

"Did Melina Mercouri ever get those marbles back to Greece?"

Scarpia's Palace

"A wise choice sir! Aah. . . Da Vinci - a genius of the Renaissance and a man who changed the face of art forever! Would you like that as a bookmark, a pencil sharpener or a fridge magnet. . . ?"

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

Modern Kids.

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

"It had to go - there were historical links with slavery."

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

Happy Hog - Manet

The pop-culture critic's annual existential crisis."

"Hi! I'm on the Sphinx!"

New Orleans Will Come Back Blues.

'Arcadian, Brian..it's an Arcadian evening!'

You'll get us thrown out of the carrion Union!

Exhibition of Paint Colors.

The London Olympic bid

Decaying corpse

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

Artist Retrospective.

West End Shows closing - box office piled high with boxes.

"Frieze!"