Vows T-Shirts

Second marriage vows.

In Sickness And In Hell

'Wait a minute -- Shouldn't you be saying something about 'If not completely satisfied'?'

"...until death do you a favor."

Minister to marrying couple: 'Remember, you're under oath.'

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

'Either you say 'I do' or you don't -- You can't plead nolo contendere.'

Gates of heaven

Novelist, writing her own vows... runs into writer's block.

"...for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death or litigation do you part?"

"You may now kiss the bride."

"If I'd known, I would've changed my vows to; Until bald and fat do we part."

"For richer or poorer, in function and dysfunction,..."

'Do you promise to love, honor, and kiss the bed covers goodbye?'

"The couple will now exchange vows they wrote themselves, because I guess mine weren't good enough, but, whatever, let's see what you've got."

'Are you kidding? Of course I take this woman - wouldn't you???'

"Do you promise to love and be faithful to each other for the next 28 days and then see where it goes from there?"

"We can't scrub the 'forsaking all others' bit."

'... and do you promise to love Angela, more than she loves you?'

"For better for worse. For richer for poorer. I sickness and in health....I warned you these vows were extremely graphic."

"Are you, Michael on the same page as Melissa?"

'I refuse to say 'Cross my heart and hope to die'.'

"Woah! Where's it say that?"

"And do you, Robert, promise not to breakdance at the reception?"

'And do you Kevin, take, no arm twisting, please.'

"… in sickness and in health, with no chance of parole for 25 years?"

'Don't I get to read the small print?'

'Will you love, honour, and share custody of the remote control so long as you both shall live?'

'Well yes, I suppose it is a multiple-choice question'

"I now mispronounce you, Mon and wafe"

'Do you, Isabel, promise to give it your best shot?'

Brother Kevin is wrecking the dorm!

'And do you, Archibald, vow to engage Gina in meaningful conversation?'

'Yes, your wedding vows are still binding even if you DID get married during the Clinton administration.'

"I, Matthew, promise to go along to get along."