Volkswagen Aficionado T-Shirts

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

Brünnhilde's Funeral Pyre

'Lover's lance isn't the same as it used to be!'

'It seats two comfortably.'

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

Route 666

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

Inflating Boobs.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

It's great for pulling the birds!

Mohammad's motors

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"Because you're a mechanic, we're going to do your hydrotherapy in a car pool."

Dave's Discount Auto Repair...only an arm or a leg, not both!

The tinman was hoping his wife liked the new muffler he bought her.

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

"Nothing serious - just some twenties stuck in your crankshaft."

Smile

"Perfect."

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

"That's weird. The app says to look for a Nissan Sentra."

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."