Vision Warriors Gifts

"Over here."

Short Sighted Driver.

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

Hospital Departments

'It's Blurred.'

'No cheating'

'Like us, the Hula Hoop will never go out of style.'

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

"He's really excited about this new proposal to let staff take over services."

A bald eagle approaches middle age

'Everyone keeps telling me I need my eyes checked, so here I am!'

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

'You say you're having trouble seeing the future.'

The optician's arrival ended Phil's short sightedness and his 15 year island exile.

"Got some bad news for you, Larry."

"With the new year approaching, I was hoping you could help with my resolution...."

"Nothing wrong with your eyesight sir: must have been a mirage you saw..."

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

"It's ok for you! My cartoonist just can't adapt to his new varifocals!!"

'You better believe I'm getting a second opinion...CATaracts, my eye!'

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

Pen mightier than sword.

"I just got a new high-def television, but I can't enjoy it because I have low-def eyesight."

'I-need-bifocal-itis.'

What brings you to therapy, Mr. Park? I'm stuck. Dr. Noodle. I'm paralyzed. I'm not making any progress. Honestly, I'm lost in the trees. I've lost sight of my goals. My health units are low. Units? Unseen enemies are everywhere. I can't sleep. I'm not eating. You're not making sense. Who am I kidding? You're right. The truth? Fine, I admit it. I can't get past level 5!!! I don't do video game counseling. If my mom loved me more, I'd be able to find more ammo.

"I'm here for an examination, my ditzy missus thinks I may need glasses."

The B1 Vitamin Bomber

"Government requires that we lower the bar."

'How do these glasses feel?'

"I don't care if it is the most realistic World War II simulator game, I still refuse to salute you."

"My eyes ache, that's enough zoom meetings and screentime for today."