Vision Comedy Buff T-Shirts

'If the subject should ever come up, you can say you're legally blind'

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

Backfire

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Cat Nip.

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'He does lack social skills.'

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

Cheeze Wiz.

"Bloody hell!"

Snowman with Happy Face Badge.

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"I made money the old fashioned way. I inherited it."

The Golfing Accident

"Is there a vegan option?"

Fishing line going in to water and then dropping down from sky at top of panel.

'Try and be pleasant dear, you don't want to alienate it.'

Cat Hecklers

"Halloween is the perfect time to land on Earth. Nobody will notice us and we can get free candy."

"Beware of the frog"

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

'Yes... but is he a good watch dog?'

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

Wedding disaster #27.

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"And would you like flies with that?"

The perfect choice for president?... Stephen Colbert!

Rollercoaster opens when it is still being built.

Milk Bar - "Don't you think you've had enough?"