Virtual Ascender T-Shirts

Saint Peter at the gates looking through a book entitled 'User Name'.

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

"Nope, not what livestream means, Bob."

i-teddy

"I'm beginning to think they replaced the ladder of success with a greased pole."

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson of the Board. One of you will be President.'

Go Play Outside - it's so real, you kids will almost smell the virtual fresh air!

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

"I've diligently spent the last eight hours saving an entire colony of elves from a pack of vicious dragons and your only concern is that it is 2 am?"

'Our gymnasium is being repaired so we played sports games on our computers.'

Indoor Football

"They're worse than carpenter ants. We have hacker ants."

'I don't care if he is the most interesting man in the world, his tweets about what he had for breakfast are still boring.'

Computer Life

'Why should I go outside...when I can build a animated snowman here.'

"I don't need therapy, but I'm concerned about my avatar. He's pretty screwed up."

' I see Brad's playing his new video game again.'

"No, playing fantasy football doesn't count as exercise. No wonder you pulled a muscle getting up on the table."

"I visited the beach on Google Earth. Next time I'll wear sunscreen."

"I know it's small and expensive, but wait till you see all the Pokemon."

"Cool bonfire app, man."

'You've been on that Video Game all Day. Go outside and play.'

'And this war game comes with an AK 47.'

"By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it."

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

Virtual Lap Dancing

'Don't you miss the thrill of the chase?'

"Wow, Greg's background makes it look like he's in space!"

"Don't get your hopes up, Filby."