Video Entrepreneur Gifts

'The Warden said you're to stop renting out the security video of your bank robbery.'

"Welcome to the future"

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'Can our software do that?'

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

US v.s. Tech Giants

Mark Zuckerberg

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

"Boss... I just read an article about trans-humanism. Apparently, sometime in the next 50 years, it will become possible to live forever."

The team video didn't spotlight my talents. I've hired my own film crew. They'll showcase my skills so college recruiters can see my strengths. Wow! How can the director pack so much into one little video? Great point! Daddy? Tell Steven Spielberg we're going feature length. Nice save!

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"Gentlemen, may I present our company's future. A buggy whip... with Bluetooth!"

Online Shopping.

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

"Is there a way to disable Narcissus' self-view?"

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

"Our cloud computing services include IaaS, PaaS, SaaS, NaaS, CaaS...and BaaS!"

"Social media stocks have taken a beating I'm seeing a lot of avatars on ledges."

'The 'Business Man's Lunch?' The chicken salad comes served in a laptop.'

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

Witch has Exorcise Video.

Smith and Hobson: People replacing people with apps and robots since 2009.

'Most of my clients are shareholders, managers and sales executives.'

"I made my first million tech consulting explaining the cloud to clients."

Well you know what they say - here today gone tomorrow - or in the case of dotcoms, here today gone shortly after lunch.

"Just in case you want to invest, I've got a great idea for a dot.com startup."

"What burns my bottom about www.dazoosucks.com is that we capitalized them."

“He runs the top Virtual Reality company in the world. In fact, that’s not really him.”

Somebody should really be filming this for YouTube.

Computer tycoon, 'It's that nerd-do-well from next door,'