Vermin Management Gifts

'Are you the lady with the mice?'

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

"Houston, we have a problem."

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

Good News about winter

Man using to much bug spray

'I found the termites!'

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

Giant slug attacks a city

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

"Yes!" "Excellent!" The Daily Bug City considers pesticides ban

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

'Do you have any properties with a termite infestation?'

Gardener with window box and giant slug.

I think I know where the noises in your wall are coming from. Pest control.

'Has anybody seen the flyswatter?'

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

“Oi! This is a no fly zone!”

Rubbish Carousel

'Ugh, we've got termites, destructive little pests.'

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

'Ooops. Look at it this way: you won't have to worry about bee mites infesting your colonies now.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

"Noah, what do you think are the most dangerous animals you've brought abroad the ark?"

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'