Vegetable Whisperer Gifts

'And this is the secret of how our company gets through hard times: we grow all our own food!'

Miracle Gro Compost.

Ernie got up on the wrong side of the garden bed again.

'The old man's really serious about his rooftop gardening.'

'Mommy has made this astonishing cake just to get you to eat your peas and provide valuable insight for your therapist in twenty years.'

Stupid blue-nosed spring onions.

Hairdresser pruning a vegetable (colour).

"Officer, ever since I left the health food store, this celery has been stalking me."

"Save yourself — it’s a casserole!"

"Psst. Pass it on. Tonight's the break!..."

"I love to cook, but usually I don't have enough parsley, sage, rosemary or time."

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

'The potatoes are over there, the brussel sprouts are next to that and right here is my husband Jack.'

'You're a real cabbage patch doll! Lettuce introduce ourselves!'

"TO youthey're baby carrots, but to us wee folk, they're fully mature vegetables!"

'This stuff isn't genetically engineered, is it?'

Two costermongers

Avocado Toast

"You're in luck. I've had great success with eggplant."

The Busy Gardener

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

Allotment

Plant Lady

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

An Unexpected Guest.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"