Vegetable Giggler T-Shirts

Onion Ring

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

The Main Types of Cheese

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

Hardy Annuals

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'Eight wiener dogs, and six rolls. It's just not right.'

"Garden variety allergies."

"Fresh pepper spray?"

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

'This place is really classy. They bring the microwave right to your table!'

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

Yard Sale

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

This is NOT 'nipping out'.