Vegans Pillows

'Hey, what happens in vegans,stays in vegans.'

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

baby sweetcorn...

"States of tofu"

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

But is it organic?

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

'Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist.'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

The discovery of asparagus.

Vegetarian Birds

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

At the market

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Before/After

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

See you at the farmers market!

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"Two vegans, please."

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Queen of Quinoa

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"Is there a vegan option?"