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Hardened Criminals

"Yes, Santa is smoking a pipe, but I'm sure he's just vaping."

"Last Vape?"

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

Merry Christmas.

"I can really taste my food since giving up smoking, so I've started again."

'A lab had me smoking cigarettes for months. I'm living off my disability payments. You?'

"What?!"

VIBES, Inc: 'Good...Bad'

"So it's agreed then. From now on we're to do our hourse trading in partially smoke-filled rooms."

"Lately my joints are stiff." "You're rollin' 'em too tight. Try vaping."

Vaping cigarette

'I'm just checking my e-cigarette.'

"Mr Hudson, could you kindly refrain from smoking in the brain scan machine."

"This is an expensive habit - I keep stubbing out my e-cigarettes."

'I don't mind him smoking in bed. . .But not herrings.'

'I told you smokefree bars wouldn't be the end of it!'

"E-cigarette or non e-cigarette section."

'No I haven't got a light, shove off!'

"I'll have you know that I'm not breathing fire at all. I'm having a vape."

"Vape 'em if ye got 'em, Blokes."

"Bob sacrifices the first burger to the barbecue gods."

The Huff & Vape

"Will you stop smoking in bed! Our money is in our mattress!"

Common Vaper

'He knew he was hyte when his last locofoco seemed gynecoid.'

Flamo the Fire Eater offering light to female bar patron

'I had a great holiday, what do you think of the suntan?'

'Mind if I smoke here, too?'

"I gave up fire breathing and switched to vaping."

"Zumting has caused dis great trauma...any idea vhat?" "Well...we were at a red light watching the guy in the car next to us eat French fries...then...alll of a sudden, she looked right at him and he...he...lit a cigarette."

'Excuse me, would you like a 'pre-coital cigarette'?'

"No cause for alarm, we're just the voices in your head on a ciggy break."

"It's totally unfair! I can't vape but you can cook with gas?!"