Vanity Victor Mugs

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

There's a slight risk of headaches as a side effect I'm afraid... Listen,headaches gave me these wrinkles in the first place!

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"I just hope the world doesn't end before people can see our outfits."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Queen of Quinoa

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

Complete Makeover

How do I love me? Let me count the ways. Ok. You have 18,523 selfies.

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

TV-Mirror.

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"

'I turn the other cheek more now that Botox has made it wrinkle-free.'

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

"Buy them - and never look back."

'I had a little cosmetic surgery done this week.'

'of course it's not natural: He dyes his mane to cover up his grey hair...'

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

Martha went to desperate lengths to avoid flat hair.

"Maybe if I put these under my pillow I'll get a visit from the hair fairy."

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'