Vacation End Planner Pillows

"Well... just 5 days, 16 hours and 30 minutes till school starts."

Airlines

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

Mr. Punch in Venice

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

Heading off with a packed bag

Italia tours

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.