Utility Bill Warrior Pillows

"We can probably just about afford to run the pilot-light."

"We just got the electrician's bill for that work he did...talk about a shock!"

'Doris! did you order Bion Energy's super saver fixed rate deal?'

'Hello? Electric company?'

"It's a ransom note from our energy supplier!"

The Solar System (after deregulation)

'I hate playing in an inflatable dome during a power outage.'

The Fuse

'I'm can't tell if this card from our insurance company is optimistic encouragement or a threat!'

'The doctor told me to avoid stress and then sends me a bill for $670.00.'

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

'This one's called 'unpaid electric bills'.'

Gas Bill

"It's just until the air conditioning in our house is fixed."

High electricity consumption in the summer

'You've cut me off. So how can I find my cheque book in the dark?'

'The instruments are suggesting that the heat pump is receiving a temperature of 105...what could possibly be heating the ground that much?'

Energy bills rise

'I know it's a constant drain of electricity, but I rationalize that it also functions as a night light.'

Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde gets his gas bill.

"Please tell me it's a local call..."

Electric Rate Hikers: ZZZZZT!

'The pain went away as soon as you said it would cost 40,000 dollars!'

'OK, it's your turn to stand by the pilot light.'

'Our water bill is more than we spent on our vacation because you again left the toilet running the whole time we were away.'

Catsulation

'Because oil is so expensive I've had to go back to using coal.'

Caution! Peak power electric bill shock possible.

Yorkshire Water - "Time to take a leak Gentlemen ?"

"Hello sir - I'm from your energy supplier. . ."

"This is your energy supplier. . . We're all on holiday in Bermuda at the moment - but leave a message and we might get back to you. . ."

"We made three billion dollars mining Bitcoin, minus our electricity bill - that comes to $1.61."

TASERS...With the cost of electricity we could only afford 50 volts.

Moaning makes you a magnet for other moaners..

"Hi! This is your energy provider - all our operatives are out on a spending spree at the moment - please try again later."