Urbanite Philosopher T-Shirts

"The end of my patience is near!"

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

No Immediate Danger

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Mr Metrosexual.

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

"What's wrong, girl? Trouble? Rachel can't decide which private school to attend?" "Upper West Side Lassie"

Can't even hold signs well.

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

"Time like these make me wish we had sprung for that apartment with a park view."

Populating URBAN DICTIONARY.

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

Demonic Repossession.

"On a clear night when the stars are twinkling over the city, I almost don’t mind that civilization collapsed."

'See, Jimmy, as the population grows too dense, the rats begin to brutalize each other...'

From Here You Can See Bugger All

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

"I wish there was a way to get out of the city this summer without leaving Manhattan."

One youth says: 'Lamppost, bollard, tarmac, kerb.' Other says: Zebra crossing,traffic hump, postbox.' Caption: Street language

"When satire becomes indistinguishable from reality, there's a problem."

'I see the rebranded mobile methadone project got underway.'

Your logic is flaccid and your data suppositional, dawg!

Amongst the rush.

'It's the council's flood defence system.'

"One day, son, all these skyscrapers that we built for no reason and lie empty will be yours."

"I don't miss my accountancy life. I find I get out more nowadays."

"Of course, you try to raise your kids so they won't need lawyers."

"The first step towards solving New York's City's problems is to STATE them, which I will now proceed to do."

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'