Unqualified Scientist Humor T-Shirts

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

Schrodinger's Black Box

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

How Glaciations Begin

It is said there is a black hole in the middle of the galaxy. But heaven knows what it looks like!

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

The new Physics

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Flan-eating bacteria

Evolution...the wifi rhino.