University Preparation Pillows

Child saves for university instead of sweeties.

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Burning the midnight oil.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

Exam

'Another football scholarship offer?'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

Four Types of Test-Takers...

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

Nervous Oral Testing

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

Good luck with all the revision...

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

Examinations.

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"I have a huge Algebra final tomorrow. I know I'm gonna fail."

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

Trust

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'You have failed on all counts...'

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

Curse or not, Dave had to pass this exam.

"Be afraid to try new things!"

Good Luck with your finals.

"I finally got tenure by publishing a research paper funded by a grant about subsidies."

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"