University Challenges Pillows

"I have a lot of student loans to pay back."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"You think you're a monster because you have poor self image."

Courage. Love.

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

Tic-tac-toe

"Sometimes it helps to turn a question around. Why not you?"

"According to my calculations...school starts in exactly 20 days!"

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

"I did seize the day. But then it seized me right back and used some kind of jujitsu move to flip me on my ass."

"Shouldn't you be studying?

"Is it me or are the obstacle courses getting harder?"

Happy Days are here again

"Look at me - I can do this!"

Discomfort zone.

'My mind was a million miles away today, but that wasn't far enough.'

'The ‘class clown' thing is my fault. I totally misjudged the crowd.'

PEP TALKS!

"Baldo, I'm proud of you for admitting you were wrong, but remember...a man who makes no mistakes usually does not make anything."

"...and I'd like to thank my mother, who is a lesbian, for guiding me through a real tough gender-identity crisis."

"If it makes any difference, it's a remarkable piece of plagiarism."

"Other than being sent to the principal's office, my detention, and three day suspension, school was good."

"You belong to a Dungeons and Dragons group, you're a committed Goth, and you're failing Medieval History?!"

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

"Well, put it this way - A semi-colon is better than a full stop."

Life gives you lemons

'Ironically, before I fell on hard times, I was a professional wine taster.'

Covid Winter

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

"Your money is no longer working for you. It got laid off."

"What say we make this one of those 'some days you get the bear' days?"

Joe's Bar: Your money back if you think you're man enough!

"Triple espresso." "Forget it, Uncle Mort. Your doctors said no caffeine." "I am not your Uncle Mort. I am someone else altogether." "Oh yeah? Who are you?" "I am... Drinkum... Coffeeman... Worthington-Smythe... of the Florida Coffeeman-Worthington-Smythes." "You may have heard of us... We're a family of... um... troubadours. I, myself, wrote several ballads for the likes of Sinatra, Pat Boone, and Jimi Hendrix." "So if I were to Google that right now, Google would confirm that?" "Google

'Don't know what else to do. The medication obviously isn't working.'

"I think he stood on a nettle."