Underdog Optimizer T-Shirts

"I've had enough of character building, Dad. Can I support a successful team now?"

"Eat my dust!"

Work Slave

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

The Leafs win the Cup!

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

Runt! You'll never make the team. We'll see! You can't even tie your shoelace! Great technique!

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

"Stop with this mathematics dictatorship."

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

'Haven't they found you a chair, yet Cludmore?'

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

David and Goliath.

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'Today's Odds' sign above a copier showing various odds for machine's malfunctions

"Lady here wants to put £5 on Cambridge 'Each way'!"

Ant holds up the word 'TRIUMPH'.

Soldier to David about Goliath: 'You did that with a step, a flick and a follow-through? Talk about high impact exercise!'

"I'd consider taking out this appendix you'renot using and greatly expanding your kidney area."

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also beating the spread."

"Not many of you may agree with me..."

"Like many attorneys I was the runt of the litter."

Stop the big guy!

'Oh great, we'll never win with this nerd on our team.'

Published but unread poet.

"Lay off the junk food, your pancreas is rusty"

"It says here researchers have found we're not as smart as some people believe."

March 8, 2030: the debut of 'Rocky 19.'

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

'You realize, don't you, that you are playing fast and loose with my self esteem?'

Balloons vs. Rockets