Twisted Gift Humor Gifts

Hunting Wolves For Fun/500 Ways to cook Mutton.

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"You can't blow out the candles. You're rolled."

Traffic calming ahead.

Bagel problems.

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

Solitaire card shark.

Tinder

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

'Mom and Dad, like when did you first text that you loved each other?'

"The 10th anniversary gift is tin. I got Ralph a new tinfoil hat. He's more sedate with the extra channels."

Dogs with alcohol collars.

'I don't know about you but I spend a fortune on shoes.'

"That does it, I'm getting a snow blower!"

The Next Product For Boomers: Designer Adult Diapers.

Scientist using his microscope to thread a needle to repair his torn shirt.

Nail Bar

Cat Taking Cat Nip Drugs.

Roo felt a little cheated with his new Christmas present.

CATS ONLY!

Helicopter as a clothes drier

A.I. Newreader Malfunctions. . . or does it?

Extra wheelie bin for cats.

I think the best part was when we decided not to record it.

"I'm not letting down my hair, I'm just overdue for a trim."

'I just feel so much better buying the free range Pinatas.'

'Didn't you buy me exactly the same book for my birthday last year?' 'Yes I did... I hope you'll read it this year...'

"You know who I'd like to see on the team? Stephen Miller."

"I have this 'I love Susie' tattoo on my chest and I married Doreen yesterday!"

'Here's a splendid cake sent in by a Mr Mugabe of Harare.'

santa claus megaphone.