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Watchdog

"They grow up so fast."

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Lazy Octopus

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Homo Zapiens

'It's 10:00. Do you know where your kids are?'

Tunnel of TV

"If I were you, I wouldn't change the channel!"

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

'It's funny really - when your father's home he hardly ever says a word!'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

'You should know better than to switch channels during a Garfield special.'

"See, Honey, I told you that TV would fit in this room!"

"Arthur, the bird's gone and done it again."

'Come on, you're telling me that you don't watch the Discovery Channel.'

'I know that other kids manage on ?5 pocket money - but their parents don't charge them to watch any television programme their parents don't happen to approve off!'

I don't want to go out, I just want to stay in.

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

"China now says it will withdraw its opposition to the missile-defense shield if the F.B.I. builds it."