Tv Talk Junkie Pillows

'I wish someone would finally make that Oprah Winfrey shush! I would but I can't find the remote.'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

'Redneck Goldfish' Earl knew better than to watch Oprah while drinking.

Dancing with the Star Wars

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

'Has Oprah ever been married?'

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

Day two of our series: America's sleeping pill addiction. My guest, pillhead Rudy Park. I'm not a pillhead. Come clean. Admit the obvious truth. What truth? Rush Limbaugh made you do it! A political pundit never misses an opportunity. You got hooked only after O'Reilly harassed you.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

"I wanted a partner... I got a co-host."

Mog The Week

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

'What TV show do frog princes go on ...?...'

"There's more to life than beer and football...I just can remember what it is."

"The real question is whether health care is a basic human right or a bona-fide commercial opportunity."

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

"Well, you gonna spin?" "Ah, maybe after another Breaking Bad."

Dr. Kapuchnik, I notice that you've been quoting Dr. Phil a lot lately. That's because I'm hoping that if he sees me sucking up to him in the comics, he'll bankroll the TV-show proposal I sent to his production company, Gasbag Enterprises.

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

Night Life: L.A.

Frank and Ernie's Poetry Corner. Robert Frost. TV Guide. I think I'll watch some late-night comedy

Do you go for Hannity or O'Reilly? Tough call. O'Reilly's presence is so big, fearless. Whereas Hannity has a wicked fast tongue and such inner strength. As symbolized externally by his jawline. O'Reilly is so tall. Something strange is happening. Coulter's a bit masculine for my tastes. Ditto. HOJ.

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

Ian Hislop

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

Man bombarded by sale adverts in the media