Tv Sports Junkie Prints

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

"All of a dither as per usual!"

Dancing with the Star Wars

Putting Practice.

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"There's more to life than beer and football...I just can remember what it is."

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

"Well, you gonna spin?" "Ah, maybe after another Breaking Bad."

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

'If social security were privatized, the administration also suggested a name change to 'Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld holdings inc.''

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K

America's funniest investment scams

How to get on talk shows by promoting your new book

'He's in training for the Olympics'

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that? I neglected to talk over you."

Wall mountable TVs.

"'60 Minutes' is on."

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."

"Honey, Clay Buchholz is about to cement a Cy Young!"

...Another second closer to kick-off....another second..

This program is made possible by donations from Don and Mary Doughaberg, and from lowlifes like you who never get their names mentioned.