Tv Program Fan Prints

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

'Mixed day on Wall Street. Economic indicators were up, but executive bonuses were down.'

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

Rocket Ark

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

"It's your final warning...Quit playing the 'Beverly Hillbillies' theme song"

Dr. Phil takes it home.

TV Situations vacant.

Moses' TV guide.

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

"My real money comes from my TV news appearances predicting stock market rises and falls."

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

"The X files...the tooth is out there"

"Whatever happened to traditional marriages? There they are...on national television...with millions of people watching...two women getting married! And they're both wearing blue jeans!"

"Thanks Dave. I don't know about you folks, but I can feel it coming in the air tonight."

'We have lost the video and voice audio, but will continue with the laugh track.'

'Sorry, viewers, I was going to show you one I made earlier but it's been scoffed by the second assistant sound engineer.'

I lost as a contestant on the quiz show, but they gave me this lovely parting gift...

Good Morning Britain has just achieved something previously thought impossible...by making Piers Morgan the most likeable man on screen.

'He's really putting that media studies degree to good use.'

'I stopped watching Sesame Street the second I found out it was educational.'

Ostrich TV.

"Popular astrologer and psychic Malder Tercado's contract with a national Spanish-language TV network was not renewed. Tercado was reportedly surprised by the news...saying he didn't see it coming."

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

'On the Highway of Life, Broderick Crawford is always pulling me over.'

"How about that! Wanda, you also landed on cheese."

'If you smiled in the mornings, you'd come up in the ratings, too.'