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"And now a special report from 'News 4' Science Editor, Dr. Frank Lovell, on how to remove your own gallbladder."

Bruce The Unhelpful Weatherman

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Meet the Enemy

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

TV jester.

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

TV-Man

"I find that hugely offensive!"

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Big screen TV.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

Love is when you watch television together.