Tv Cooking Show Enthusiasts Prints

Cannibal cookery programme.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

'The following programme contains scones of a sexual nature.'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

"Then add one extra large egg..."

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

"Look at the size of this gas bill - you'll have to get rid of some of those celebrity chefs!!"

"When did they add this channel?!"

Here's one I made earlier.

My Cauldron Rules

"I should have never let you watch those cooking shows on TV!"

Chefs

'For this dish we're going to need two bottles of good quality red wine. And that's before we even start cooking.'

'Ready, steady, Operate'

"The recipe says, that the whipped cream has to be piped onto the sponge."

'Gentlemen, put your money away. When it comes to killing TV chefs, I work for free.'

I'll say one thing for that chef on TV...he really makes deboning a chicken look easy.

"You missed the garlic. The place went nuts when he added the garlic."

"...and here's some I made earlier..."

'It's indigestion due to your lifestyle, you're watching too many T.V. cookery shows.'

'Amazing - No sooner do we invent cooking than we get the first celebrity chef.'

'Noooo! You idiot! For crying out loud! Sear it first! Then a slow oven.'

'Son, do you think I'm ready for my own cooking show?'

'Celebrity chef' 'Celery chef'