Turkey Tradition Buff Pillows

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"Talk about close calls! Harry, tell them about last Thanksgiving!"

"Never say you're stuffed!"

'Haven't you ever heard of warmed up turkey?'

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

A Dog Is For Life Not Just For Christmas.

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

Turkey Dinner and gravity

Ineffective Turkey Disguises

"He bought a thermometer for me, and I'm not even sick."

'I don't know what happened in there, Stanley... But I've completely lost the urge to eat. I mean it - I feel stuffed! Supposed to come back right before thanksgiving for a follow-up though.'

Holiday Overkill.

'Next year we'll bring the turkey.'

Turkey Farm Inc: 'And guess what you get for a Christmas bonus?'

'You have your Boxing Day dip and I'II have mine...'

God perfects his turkey design.

"Hippity hoppity. Easter's on its way."

"Bad news - your DNA was delicious."

Christmas escape plan

'Want to come to the Thanksgiving play, Grandma? I have a real meaty part.'

'Do you think they'll feed us something special for Christmas dinner?'

Turkey under mistletoe with sign that says: 'Kiss your ass goodbye'.