Trial Aficionado Pillows

A witness giving testimony in court

An identity thief takes the stand.

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

'Are you capable of distinguishing right from wrong?', 'Can you give me a hint?'

'You lucked out -- the grand jury doesn't want to get involved.'

'Your honor, we are appealing on grounds the post-trial book deals didn't match the pre-trial publicity.'

These things are sent to try us.

Trial by Media

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"You can't plead cute."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Sue The Bastards

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

They Are Not Going to Take Me

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.