Trend Forecaster Gifts

"Report back to us about trends."

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

Men's business romper.

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

Emergency Hipster Beard

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

Evolving Changes in Medical Lingo

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."

Chicken - "The Dow is falling...the dow is falling..."

'Why don't you use more blue? -- Blue is very popular these days.'

The Euro - R.I.P.

'What's this I hear about you going long?'

"Which way up do you want it?"

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

Utility Chic.

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

'Did I doze off for a couple of years? Since when did cupcakes become a big deal?'

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

#notblessed

"Is this piece of artwork or a chart of current market trends?"

"Can you keep a secret, Fred? The truth is, I've never had a clue what curve it is I'm supposed to stay ahead of!"

'First the good news.'

'Do you have it in black?'

"The economic modeling of our economic modeling suggests we need to remodel."

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."