Trend Commentator Prints

The Bland Leading the Bland

Men's business romper.

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

'Stocks shot up. . . no one on the committee could understand a word that Bernanke was saying.'

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

"I can't believe I sold my soul for platforms, they're so last season"

I started my own Youtube channel. What's it about? Well, there are already too many stupid-stunt-and-prank channels, and too many holier-than-thou-independent-news-analysis channels. But get this: There were absolutely zero holier-than-thou-stupid-stunt-and-prank-analysis channels. Probably a reason for that. My first hard-hitting post reveals how the inauthenticity of the "Mario Kart" prank is driving away Millennials.

"He's our new trend-spotter?"

Fashion Mag - Totally in - So last season

Kevin: King of the Social Influencers.

'Remember kid, if the market goes down, it's a buying opportunity and if the market goes up it's the start of a rally.'

"I call it decking - it will be all the rage in a few years."

"He's trying to feel which way the wind is blowing."

"If I hear the word ‘mindfulness’ one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it."

New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread

'I can't go in there now, I'll look ridiculous.'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

'Eddie, politicians everywhere are kicking cans down the road, so maybe it's time to get in on the boom in tin.'

Designer Republic of Shoreditch

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

"Dwayne is very important to us. He knows exactly when a trend will become a craze."

"Granddad was the very first person ever to say 'Oh, wow!' "

"These masks are getting skimpier every day."

"Reality??? Man, you're hopelessly outdated! Nowadays we have forecasts and statistics."

"I just discovered where the company's money is going. Since when did we start paying our employees?"

"I don't know what's happening, but lately I've been feeling afraid of my own clothes"

Loft Extensions Company - Extended Sales Chart.

Turkey a la Mode

'Simmons is our expert in oil stocks.'

In Trays titled: 'In', 'Out' and 'Back in Again'.

Sty Guru

"You really can't look at things in a black and white perspective anymore, Especially as we said that white is the new black."

Housing bubble

Announcing the Fad Herald. I am not worthy. Coffee. Black. Straight coffee. Are fancy espresso drinks out? Is that your pronouncement? No pronouncement. My hours have been cut back. I'm here on my own time. Furloughs are in?! You're reading too much into this. Interpretations are out.