Trend Analyzer T-Shirts

"That's our department of microeconomics."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Men's business romper.

Emergency Hipster Beard

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"On Wall Street today, news of lower interest rates sent the stock market up, but then the expectation that these rates would be inflationary sent the market down, until the realization that lower rates might stimulate the sluggish economy pushed the mark

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

'Why don't you use more blue? -- Blue is very popular these days.'

'What's this I hear about you going long?'

"Which way up do you want it?"

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

#notblessed

'Did I doze off for a couple of years? Since when did cupcakes become a big deal?'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

"Is this piece of artwork or a chart of current market trends?"

"Can you keep a secret, Fred? The truth is, I've never had a clue what curve it is I'm supposed to stay ahead of!"

'First the good news.'

"The economic modeling of our economic modeling suggests we need to remodel."

'There's a bear on line one and a bull on line two. Who do you want me to put through first?'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

"Halloween stuff already? It's August!"

"Remarkable, but I'd feel so much better about it if we knew what the hell we're doing right."

Sales Research shows it's too big for them to carry home, sir.

Hipster Police Department

"Dear, it's the financial news. Seat belts fastened, seat backs in upright position."

"I'm thinking of letting my bangs grow out."