Tree Sap Tapper Pillows

"Lovely dovetail."

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

Timber preservation

A man plays golf by the sea

Dancing in a circle

"You know what burns me up? I deliberately kept my life uneventful, and I got old anyway."

'I didn't write the report. I printed it directly from the Internet, but I did all of the stapling and collating myself.'

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

Man talking to a tree.

Tree sap drips makes man need the toilet.

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"I know that pretty tune! You're the bloke who tinkles away in all those tv documentaries. Irritating!"

"These photos are so great. I can't wait to post them during peak hours over the next week to maximise jealousy."

"Quit complaining and decorate it! Number one, it's tradition, number two, it's nobody we know..."

The Environmentalist Fighting Deforestation

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor.'

'Of all times to have a dance tune get stuck in my head.'

'This looks like a deer feeding area.'

A man fishing in a tree stump

Box Step

'Human beings get all the breaks -- just TRY to get Medicare to pay for a tree surgeon!'

"Let's surprise Mom with ANOTHER Christmas tree!"

"Ironically, he's being used to create 'save our forest' pamphlets."

Man with fake trunk to help him lift timber

'You've got the wrong end of the stick again. The problem is this end. '

'Hey buddy, can you cut down that one to give me a better view?'