Travel Humor Fan Gifts

Tipperary: Long way and short way.

Roman Catholic Guilt Trips

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'Finally!'

Guilt trip.

"Well yes, I'm a 'roadrunner', but I haven't been on a road for ages: too much traffic, too dangerous..."

Bulls at Pamplona - 'Next year I'm going to walk.'

'How much is that doggie in the window?' - Dogs in Amsterdam

Gift shop in casino caters to winners and losers.

"We aim to make every event on this cruise pleasurable, sir!" (lifebuoy with duck head on it).

Basic Economy

"Whether I have five passengers or five hundred, I try to make the same inane announcements."

"There's a gender neutral toilet under the bed."

"Don't worry, he says they're just here on holiday."

Excess Baggage: By the end of your cruise vacation, your clothes seem to have shrunk for no reason.

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

Bird with Sick Bag.

"New Hampshire kinda welcomes you. Live free or die."

'You fool, Joe - I told you never to stop for hitch-hikers!'

Flight Insurance for Angels.

H.M.Customs 'Nothing to declare' 'Articles to declare' 'Genius to declare'

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

'You heard me -take me to V'

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

Can I have a look at the map?

Carefree luggage.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"